A long, long time ago, on a farm somewhere in Nevada, there was a rabbit hole. The Rabbit Hole, as it was simply known, was the most beautiful spot of land you would have ever seen in your whole entire life. Painted splendidly with the most beautiful hues of green and covered in the most delicious, ripe, juicy orange carrots that would send your taste buds to heaven in a mustang, it was also the most prosperous of land. It’s inhabitants were the cheeriest bunch of things in the world, who had semi-daily celebrations for the most tiny of going-ons. The inhabitants once held a two-day celebration because the resident barber changed from mint toothpaste to carrot flavored toothpaste, and as such, there was much rejoicing. All this was quickly changed, sadly, on a calm and rather beautiful July day, when the mayor of the rabbit hole, Mayor Rabbington, declared war on the nearby patch of land known as the Garden of Spud for reasons that he did not reveal.
If the Rabbit Hole was heaven, the Garden of Spuds was... definitely not heaven. The lands in the Garden of Spuds were just as brown, murky, and muddy as the the Rabbit Hole was green and inspiring. The whole area was like a maze, so full of the spiraling roots of the newborn and prospering spuds (baby potatoes), and the potatoes where not always the cheeriest of folk. They rarely had celebrations - their one and only true celebration, where every spud school was closed and potatoes didn’t work, was the colonial Food Festival, in which on that very day, May 3rd, many many years ago, a magical potato ate over five-hundred cheese doodles in 12 minutes and survived to live the story. Even then, many suggest that they are not truly celebrating this joyous and magical event, but they are really celebrating what happened AFTERWARDS - he exploded, and they all feasted on his cheesy filling. Nobody to this day knows what ignited the war between the bunnies’ Rabbit Hole and the potatoes’ Garden of Spud, but many suggest that Mayor Rabbington simply did not like the average potato’s way of life. The mayor, being such a man of amazing talents, always manages to somehow avoid the question in a new and creative way. But rarely did people ask questions. After all, why would you ask questions? Mayor Rabbington was always right - everybody knew that. Nobody defied him - he was, after all, the law. If you do, you will soon be read about in the newspaper due to your tragic death by heart attack.
Almost four years have now passed. The war is getting more and more violent by the day - there are forty two recorded casualties per day and rising for the rabbits. Things are looking grim, as there is no end to the fighting in sight. Dwayne Fluffytail is a rabbit in his mid-fifties, small and slightly old fashioned looking, even maybe a bit beyond his years. His attire of preference is a simple, nice darker colored fur-coat, and sometimes even a very dashing top-hat. Dwayne suffered major trauma in a very fierce battle against the potatoes, and is now in a state of economical depression. Behind every great rabbit is his spouse, and Edith Fluffytail fills that role. She is a kind, gentle creature who would not be able to do so much as mash a carrot. Dwayne believes she looks simply beautiful in her almost golden (yet fading, slowly, with time) fur. Dwayne and Edith are seen as heroes and the kindest, most gentle rabbits in all of the Rabbit Hole, despite their problems, which are unfortunately plentiful. For example, did you know that, because of an unfortunate side-effect of headache medicine, Edith is unable to become pregnant?
“Dwayne, oh Dwayne! Get off the couch for gods sake, Dwayne! You’ve got to do the farming!” Edith hollered at him. “Would you like me to do it, Dwayne?”
“No, no, darling... I’m up, I’m getting up! I was just watching the -”
“The Office?” Edith interrupted.
Dwayne coughed, picked up the remote and changed the channel to ATR News. “No, the NEWS, dear. The NEWS. Do you see it?”
Edith giggled. “Yes, I see it, dear. Please go, I am hungry for a carrot.”
Dwayne got up, mumbling, and walked out of the living room. Not a second later, he screamed.
“MY TOE!!! MY TOE!!”
“Did you stub your toe again, dear?”
“It’s not my fault! It stubbed itself! It hates me, Edith! It hates me!”
Edith sighed. Dwayne was a crazy guy, that was sure. But she loved him more than anything - but where Dwayne’s loyalty’s lay, she was not so sure. Sometimes she thought that he was more willing to die for the Rabbit Hole and for Mayor Rabbington than he was willing to do so for her. But whenever she thought this, she just thought of a nice, juicy carrot. It wasn’t worth thinking about, it wasn’t worth worrying about.
“Is this one nice, dear?” Dwayne had just walked back into the room of living with a gigantic carrot twice the size of Edith.
“Yes, yes, that one’s perfect. Would you like some carrot and dirt stew?”
“I’d love some carrot and dirt stew. Easy on the dirt, extra carrot, OK?”
“Sounds good to me.”
“What sounds good to you?”
“Extra carrot, easy on the dirt.”
“If you say so.”
Sometimes it is hard hard living with a woman like Edith, does she ever make any sense? Dwayne couldn’t help but wonder.
I wonder what goes on in his little head... Edith found herself wondering.
A knock on the door knocked sense back into both of them. It was the local paper boy for the The Daily Papah (maybe the head of paper had a bad Boston Accent or something, who knows?), Terry Poizinhour. Edith opened up the door, gave him his money, smiled sweetly, and took the paper.
What she did next was rather unexpected. She screamed.
Then she screamed louder.
“Edith, what is it?!”
“Oh, Dwayne! The potatoes are at it again! They... they...”
“What is it, Edith!? What happened?” Dwayne hollered before snatching and reading the paper quietly to himself.
Potato’s army conquered neighboring village Orangaton... a new record in civilian casualties... many missing, supposed dead... Dwayne could not help but form a tear in his small, black marble of an eye. Orangaton was a small colony located rather close to the Garden of Spud - it was mainly inhabited by some hundred rabbits, and a few potatoes. A long family friend to the Fluffytail family lived in Orangaton, Sir Jebidiah. He prayed for Jebidiah’s safety, but deep inside he knew that the odds were against him. From what he could gather, not many had a chance - especially considering Jebidiah’s knighthood, he was a rabbit of great influence, and therefor a likely target. Dwayne paused for many seconds, gathering his thoughts. When he finally spoke again to Edith, he did so with a worried voice, and did so half-heartily.
“He... he will be ok, Edith. Do not worry. Sir Jebidiah’s one of the most respectable rabbit in all the land. He will survive.” Edith was flabbergasted. She didn’t know what to say, and she didn’t know how to say it. So Dwayne took the liberty of filling in the silence with his voice.
“Those potatoes are savage creatures. They know not the consequences of their actions.... they don’t think of the people. They don’t think of the families that have been broken because of this war. Do you remember the Rogbington family? Used to live down the road? Always kept their noses clean, they did... didn’t stop the potatoes from snatching them the first chance they had. They will do anything to break apart families.” Edith did not seem to be soothed by what her husband said. In fact, she didn’t seem to hear him. She was occupied by staring out the window for a very long time. It took a good five minutes, in which Dwayne used to quietly eat his soup, until Edith said anything. She mumbled as she spoke. “A storm’s approaching. They will... they’ll harvest.” She nudged her head toward the direction of the window. “The beasts.... they will want their stock. We must prepare. Quickly! Go outside, and get anything you can. HOLD THE FORT!” Edith put on her pirate hat. She did this whenever she got nervous - it was her most prized possession.
Dwayne said nothing, but he moved with haste, quickly moving outside to protect his house. They would be coming as they always did when the sky darkened, and boy was the sky dark. A storm was definitely approaching, and likely it was going to cause a lot of damage with the land. He grabbed everything he could - all of the carrots, all of his tools, and his toy sandbox. The... monsters will not destroy my things, take our food, or terrorize my home! His mind was racing. He grabbed everything he could.
Boom. There was a large crash in the sky, followed by a bright blinding light. The storm was approaching fast - faster then he thought. The men of all the surrounding houses were now outside, salvaging everything they could. “WELL, THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN, HUH DWAYNE?” called one of his neighbors, John.
“Unfortunately! Hey, have you heard from anyone in Orangaton?” Dwayne screamed. The howling wind carried away his calls as easily as it carried away the leaves and pebbles.
“Dwayne! What was that? I can’t hear you!”
“Orangaton! Have you heard from anyone?”
The wind howled.
“No, I don’t like oranges!”
“No! Did you hear? Orangaton! Got invaded! Potatoes!”
“Oh! Yes, I heard! Dreadful... no, sorry Dwayne, I haven’t! It’s getting stormy... let’s go inside! Talk to you later? You and Edith can stop by for tea and carrots anytime, my friends!”
“Thanks!” Dwayne got the last of his supplies, and tripped over a very large lawn gnome they keep around for, you know, sentimental purposes. He got a very large scrape on his left elbow and a tear formed in a small beady eye. What was worse, though, was the loud banging noise coming from over the hole.
The wind stopped howling.
Another bang, followed by a roar of evil that sent goose-bumps down Dwayne’s furry little back.
The humans were coming.
He jumped up and screamed a silent scream, and ran to his house door. BAM! The ground shook as if in a violent rage and knocked Dwayne off of his feet, but not before smashing his head against the lawn gnome. He cursed at the lawn gnome in between groans of pain, he was going to get rid of that lawn gnome if it was the last thing he did. Another bang. Dwayne started sweating and uttering a prayer. He tried to move his legs, but they would not work. Another scream was heard, closer this time. They were coming! Another bang. Dwayne cursed silently to himself, managed just barely to push himself up back on his feet.
Bang. The last thing Dwayne could remember was a gigantic, mutant freak hand with five large, meaty fingers plowing down, ready to grab him... then black.
There was a light.
Why is there always a light? It was very bright. Dwayne’s eyes blinked repeatedly in the light.
“Oh, thank god! He’s coming around! Edith! Come over, he’s ok!” a male’s voice said.
“Dwayne! Oh my god, Dwayne! You’re OK!” He knew this one, this was Edith’s. “Thank you, John! You saved him! He’s OK!”
Ah, so that’s who that was. John. Hello John.
“Hello John.” Dwayne mumbled. He smiled a half-hearted smile, for half of his heart was turned off temporarily. “What... what happened? Are you OK? The storms! The humans! Carrots! How is the land? Is the mayor hurt!”
“It’s OK, hun! You were hurt, you were hallucinating, but you’re OK. The humans... they were going to...” she broke out in tears, “...they were going to get you, Dwayne. But John saw you right before he went in, and he jumped out and saved you. He bit the human’s finger and saved you! Isn’t that wonderful?”
“Thank... thank you John. This means... thank you.”
Twenty-minutes passed. They were in John and his wife, Mary's house. Mary made them all some tea and they began to talk for a while, all except for Dwayne. Dwayne was very quiet throughout the whole conversation, and up to the point of when they wished each other their awkward good-byes, Dwayne hadn’t said a word. It was almost as if he was in some sort of shock from the whole ordeal.
And so life in the Rabbit Hole continued, and if not, the war most certainly did. With-in a weeks time the rabbits took immediate action against the potatoes for the attack on Orangaton, and it is no longer under the potatoes’ rule. In-fact, a new tactic was created because of the very battle that freed Orangaton from the potatoes’ rule, the rabbits have now taken to what has been dubbed by people who are familiar with it “mashing” - the rabbits smash and squash the potatoes into slop (yet, very tasty slop). Yet still it seemed as if every day a record was being broken - most recorded civilian casualties, a record high number of damages, and even a record high amount of damages in pianos. The potatoes numbers have been lessened by both the increase in rabbits and the rabbit’s new mashing technique. Things are looking up for the rabbits for sure, and the inhabitants of the Rabbit Hole’s spirits were high. Mayor Rabbington’s speech did nothing but bring the already soaring spirits higher.
“We are living in a time of hardship, war, and suffering.” He said. “But there is light at the end of the tunnel. And I believe that our recent success in Orangaton and the general direction the war has turned, it is proof that we are closer to that light then we have been.” In-fact, his speech was so inspiring to the rabbits that they had a week long celebration in which they feasted on mashed carrots day in, day out. They held contests on who ate the most, on who puked the most AFTER eating the most, and who fainted the longest after puking the most after eating the most.
When the celebration was over, the streets were nearly completely devoid of rabbit life. It was a foggy, dreary day the day after, with sprinkles of murky water being thrown over the land in a slow succession. There were party hats littered about all over the sidewalks, mashed carrot splattered all over the surrounding area, and even a homeless rabbit munching on left-overs. Edith Fluffytail was dismayed.
“I just don’t understand...” she stated to herself as she walked down the long, polluted dirt road. “It truly isn’t that big of a deal, is it? What is the need for such a celebration?” She continued her stroll silently, and didn’t stop until she reached the local marketplace, the Market Hole. The Market Hole, which was usually completely buzzing with activity, was the exact opposite on this very day. There were very few rabbits out, and those who were were hurriedly running past, quickly moving to their destinations whilst occasionally bumping into Edith and muttering a quick apology. She sighed. Apparently it wasn’t a shopping day.
She hurried to the Trader Hare’s stand, and quickly browsed for her merchandise. There was a female rabbit behind the counter, holding the Daily Papah in her hands. She occasionally eyed Edith with a fierce look from her dark, deep blood red eyes, but said nothing. Edith could feel the rabbit’s eyes locked onto the back of her neck. She tried to ignore it and continued her shopping. After picking out her merchandise (a large carrot, some onions, and, oddly enough, a picture of Mayor Rabbington), she headed towards the counter. The rabbit’s eyes followed Edith’s as she walked to her.
“Evening.” Edith said as she reached the counter. The rabbit said nothing. Edith coughed. She placed her items on the counter, and the rabbit took a quick look at them. She snorted.
“Mayor Rabbington?” she said at last.
“Err, yes...” Edith answered, a little taken aback by her tone of voice. She was obviously not a fan of their fair mayor.
“Why would you want a picture of him? I could imagine it would make fine firewood, don’t get me wrong...” she went on.
“Well, my husband pretty much loves him, he’s very loyal to our home... served in the army, you know.” At this, the rabbit behind the counter looked rather surprised. She said nothing, but rung up the items. After she finished bagging, she spoke again.
“You would think that he would love you, and not the mayor.” She picked up her newspaper and continued reading. Edith turned around, and stared blankly for a few seconds.
Dwayne was sitting on his favorite chair in his favorite spot watching his favorite show (The Office) when Edith walked threw the door. Dwayne turned his head a little and stared at Edith. She looked as if her mind hadn’t yet completely caught up with the rest of her. Her face was stiff, she looked as if she was very spooked. “Edith...?” Dwayne asked, concerned.
“No. Don’t you...” she said sternly, “...talk to me.” Dwayne was taken aback.
“What happened?” he asked, a little hurt.
“Nothing. Just... nothing.” she snapped.
Dwayne shrugged. He stopped trying to figure Edith out ages ago. “Oh.. Edith, did you hear the news? Mayor Rabbington’s speech left such an impression on even the potatoes, they tightened security on all of their major holds.... Mt. Reymound, even the Sunburnt Lettuce Patch! They’re worried, Edith - they’re worried.” As Dwayne finished saying this, Edith turned to head into the bedroom. She stopped one step shy of the door, turned around, and said “That, Dwayne.... is exactly my problem.” She took another step into the room. Dwayne was dumbstruck - he had no idea what had just happened. What did he say? Was Edith so un-loyal that she didn’t care about the war, or the Rabbit Hole? Dwayne did not know, but he was thoroughly disappointed with her - and slightly disappointed with himself. He couldn’t quite put his paw on it.
All the way on the other side of the plains, the potatoes’ moods matched Dwayne and Edith’s. They were thoroughly unpleased at this whole ordeal - they knew that they were losing soldiers at an alarming rate. The effect of “mashing” was devastating on the Garden of Spuds. Everybody’s moods were dismal to say the least. Many businesses actually shut down temporarily due to lack of ambition, the streets were completely empty, schools were closed, and even the weather seemed as if there was much to be desired. Families stopped eating dinner together, and fully grown potatoes didn’t get out of their dirt patch in which they slept all day long. It truly was the opposite of the Rabbit Hole. And, for the Garden of Spuds and Orangaton, it was about to get a whole lot worse.
Edith was still in the bedroom - Dwayne chose not to go after her or ask what was wrong. He knew better than to bother Edith when she got in one of her moods, so he turned on the news channel on the television. Slowly, his vision blurred. He could no longer make out the dancing figures displayed on the 15” television set. He was nearly asleep when suddenly there was a flash of a very bright light, followed by a loud boom. Dwayne’s eyes jerked open very suddenly, and his back became very, very straight. Not so soon, surely? he thought. Alas, his worst fears were confirmed when he heard pounding on the roof of the house, and another loud bang. “EDITH!” he screamed. “Stay in our room, Edith! I’m going out, I’ll gather the crops!” he received no answer from the other room. He sighed. She apparently was still very angry at him. What did I do? No, no time to think. He ran took a deep breath, and jolted towards the door. He tugged at the handle - at first the door wouldn’t open. He tugged harder. It jolted open finally, and snapped off it’s hinges. The wind was very strong, and the rain was literally destroying branches and twigs. There was nobody else outside.
Dwayne quickly ran over to the lawn gnome that was dropped on the ground, picked it up, and threw it into the wind. The wind was so strong it literally took the rather heavy gnome away with it. Good, he thought. No lawn gnome for me to trip over. He ran over on the side of his small, circular house to the large garden which held at least twenty large carrots, some lettuce, and tomatoes. He grabbed as many carrots as he could (which were just three - they were at least twice the size of his head, each), grabbed a tomato, and a couple of lettuce patches. Another flash of bright white light, lightning. He screamed into the howling, deafening wind. He was very frustrated, having just dropped and smashed the tomato onto the ground. Boom. Thunder, now. He took his stuff, and ran as fast as he could towards the front of the house. He heard another boom, from the distance - but this boom was different. It was not a noise caused by a natural occurrence, but instead the boom of a very large object smashing against the ground. He gulped. It was no doubt.. the humans. He dropped everything he was holding at once, and they blew away in the wind. Dwayne planted his little feet firmly into the dirt, and tugged along scrapping his feet in the direction of the house. The wind grew even louder and more fierce, and Dwayne’s lips curled backwards in the wind. It was at the exact point that he reached the door, he realized he didn’t actually HAVE a door anymore. Panicking, he dragged and piled everything he could into the small spot that used to hold his door, and huddled himself under his chair. He closed his eyes, and prayed.
When Dwayne’s eyes opened, it was, yet again, very bright. This time he didn’t mind as much, the bright light was actually welcome in his eyes, as it was very dark the last time his eyes worked, it was very dark and dreary. Quite depressing, really. But Dwayne was not at all brought to rest by the light - his memory was quickly returning to him.
“What.. what happened...” he mumbled to himself. “There was.. a light.. and a storm! The humans! Oh thank god, I’m OK...” he jolted his eyes around the house. The inside of the house was well enough - the miniature wall that Dwayne had made seemed to do an OK job at keeping most of the water out of the house, and there were only a couple of things that had fell off their spots onto the ground. There was glass thrown about the corner of the house, yet it all seemed to be relatively in shape. Realizing that Edith was in their room the whole time, he quickly jumped up and ran into the room. Edith was laying down in the hay patch, snoring slightly. She was not awoken by the noise caused by the storm, or apparently by the noise caused by the humans. The humans. Dwayne, feeling a little better knowing that Edith was laying in bed asleep and unharmed, ran outside to check the damage.
Outside of the house, the Rabbit Hole was mostly unharmed. He looked around and scanned the surrounding planes. A few uprooted trees, a lot of paper thrown about, and even a 1950s singer, but that was about it. Dwayne scratched his head. This had to be a new one... the humans always came while a storm was brewing. It was the only time of the year they attacked, minus the yearly harvest. He couldn’t say he was terribly disappointed. He turned around and walked back into the home, picking up and reattaching the door to it’s hinges as he went. He sat down on his chair and rubbed his eyes. What time was it? He had lost track. He doubted that he even knew the date anymore. And why was Edith acting like this towards him? He contemplated opening up that door and waking her from her slumber to ask, but he did not dare. Let her sleep, he thought. Grumbling slightly, he got up and turned on the television, which came to life instantly. A grainy picture of Mayor Rabbington appeared on the screen. Dwayne’s ears spiked up, listening intently.
“My friends, my fellow rabbits...” he started. Good, Dwayne thought. I haven’t missed a single bit of the speech. “As you are well aware, a storm was upon us last night, wreaking havoc with our crops and nerves. It has since past, and we in the Rabbit Hole are thankful for it has been relatively sparing towards us.” He paused for a short second. “But, some of us,” he started, “have not been so lucky. Many of you have noticed that the humans were indeed about last night, but they did not harm us. Their victim is now clear on this storm’s eve. We have received conformation that the humans have attacked, and completely destroyed, everybody and everything in Orangaton.” A small tear appeared to form in the mayor’s eye. It rolled down his face, which looked more tired and worn then ever. “According to insider reports, nobody was spared. Nobody managed to escape the human’s terrible wrath... and we have, as of now, given up our search for survivors.” Dwayne started to quietly cry to himself at these words. But the mayor was not done speaking.
“My apologies and most sincere grievances go out to all that may have had blood relations or acquaintances in Orangaton. I would love nothing more but to stand up here, today, and tell you that everything is OK. I want nothing more than that, truly. But it is not my job to sugarcoat the truth. It is my job to come up here and tell you that there is not a hope left in anybody who’s familiar with the situation’s mind. Your relations, if any, have for certain left us.” With that, the kind mayor lifted his top-hat, bowed, and left the stage, leaving Dwayne sprawled out on the floor, crying to himself. Sir Jebidiah... he could not be dead. He could not be dead. Dwayne had yet to pay back his debt to Jebidiah, who he had spent over half of his life with...
How much time Dwayne spent lying there, on the ground, Dwayne didn’t know. He had lost track. The morning had turn well past noon, and it was probably nearing evening. Edith was still in her room, getting up only once to close the door. Dwayne was slipping in and out of consciousness, severely lacking the necessary energy to get up off the dirty floor of his home. He lay there, deep in thought. He knew what he had to do, deep inside. It wasn’t long until he made up his mind.
He forced himself off the ground slowly. His knees wobbled and his ears twitched, but he was finally coming back to. He knew what he had to do, and there was nothing in the universe that could stop him. But he needed a ride. He needed a ride, and he needed directions... no matter, he’d figure all of that out once he was out. He put on his top-hat, and a worn, patched gray cape. He was nearly at the door when a voice spoke out behind him.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
Dwayne turned around to see a very weary, tired looking Edith standing at the doorway. “Edith, darling...”
“Don’t you Edith darling me. Where are you going.”
“There was a storm, Edith. Orangaton is...” Dwayne stopped suddenly. He twitched. “...destroyed. They haven’t found many survivors, Edith, and I am worried for Jebidiah... I planned on going to lo-”
“Don’t you dare leave this house.”
“Edith. I need to know if he is OK. How am I to live with the uncertainty?”
Edith sighed. She spoke with a slight stutter. “Dwayne, listen to me. You leave this house and I won’t be here when you come back.”
“Edith... but, please Edith...”
“You heard me.”
Dwayne stood in shock. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. What in the world is wrong with Edith? he thought. “Edith... what’s wrong? You’re not your self, you haven’t been for the past day or two... what’s wrong?”
“I’m going back to my room. I expect to see you in the Dining Hall in half an hour.” She then turned around and stepped back into her room closing the door as she did so, leaving Dwayne standing right in front of the door leading outside, dumbstruck. He didn’t know what to do. He loved Edith, he really did, but he just couldn’t live with the guilt... he opened the door and walked through it, into the morning’s sun and the brisk cold. He pushed Edith out of his mind.
Orangaton lay two villages to the east of The Rabbit Hole. While it wasn’t a very far distance away, on foot it would take Dwayne most of the day and night to reach, which he considers an unimaginably long voyage. So he did the first thing he thought of - he went to John’s house and asked if he had anything that would shorten his voyage. “Are you sure you want to do this?” asked John. He looked worried. “It could be dangerous, Dwayne...”
“I’ve never been more sure in my life.” Dwayne answered with an unwavering sternness in his voice. John sighed. He knew that there was nothing he could do or say to change his mind.
“Alright, if you’re sure...” John lead Dwayne out to his backyard, which was surprisingly spacious.
“Oh, wow, from the front it looks almost as if you don’t even have a backyard...” expressed Dwayne.
“It’s an illusion.”
“OK... anyways...” Dwayne dropped the subject.
The back of John’s house was, as previously stated, very spacious. It looked like a miniature farm residing in the Rabbit Hole, full on with a bright red ranch. There were tumbleweeds blowing around in the gentle breeze. Dwayne couldn’t help but stop and stare at the simple beauty. Infact, Dwayne couldn’t recall the last time he ever actually sat down and looked at the beauty that surrounded him from every direction, as far as the eyes could see...
“Yeah, I like it.” said John, smiling. Dwayne tried to say something, but no words came out. He felt flushed, in a way he had never been before. His stomach felt uneasy, and his mind was completely devoid of anything but the beauty. He stood there, taking it all in... he could stand there for days, basking in the magnificent sight placed before him. Why hadn’t he noticed this before?
“You see over there?” said John, pointing a small little paw in the direction of the ranch. “I’ve got some of the best darn mushrooms this side of the hole, m’friend. They’re as loyal and speedy as you can hope for, and they do their best. You can borrow one of them, if you’d like. I’m sure riding on one of them mushrooms over to Orangaton would get you there thrice as speedily as on bare paw.” Dwayne, now broken out of his daze, gladly accepted John’s offer and took the biggest mushroom of the bunch. Dwayne eyed the mushroom. It was large, about three-quarters the size of Dwayne or John, and had light green spots smoothly fading in and out of the top portion of the mushroom. It hovered an inch or two off the ground, which gave it a gentle, smooth glide across even the most patchy and rough patch of land. John gave a little cough. “We like to call her Lassie.” Dwayne turned his head and faced John.
“It fits her.” Dwayne smiled.
The road to Orangaton was rough. There were numerous times where Dwayne had to stop and check which direction he was going, or if he could keep going at all. By the time Dwayne reached the half-way mark (he knew where this point was because of the sudden change in vegetables), he was severely burnt in numerous places. The sun was beating down on him and Lassie, slowly weakening Dwayne... but Lassie didn’t seem to mind. She actually seemed to like the sun. Dwayne was glad to have a companion who he knew would never yell at him, nor threaten to leave him. He knew that when he turned around after a short break, Lassie would still be right there by his side... mushroom really was rabbit’s best friend. Dwayne closed his eyes and slept, trusting Lassie to keep him safe, and before he knew it, Dwayne’s eyes opened only to gaze at the ruins of what was once a prospering colony. Dwayne couldn’t believe his eyes.
Orangaton, which was once large, beautiful, and buzzing with activity was now compact, dusty, grimy, and, worst of all, empty. There was a horrid, eerie feeling hung in the air. It felt rather like an old ghost town. There were large signs, doors, books, and more littered all about the ground. Huge amounts of dust were suspended in the air, floating all around, limiting Dwayne’s vision immensely. The ruins of large buildings were scattered among the grounds. Dwayne couldn’t be sure from the distance, but he thought he saw a body or two lingering about, ever still. Dwayne gulped. It didn’t look good. Maybe I was wrong... maybe there is no hope... he thought. His body was stiff and rigid, his muscles ached, and his nose was dry, but he swore he would some day repay his debt to Sir Jebidiah, and that’s just what he planned to do. After tying Lassie down using some rope he found in the now collapsed Rope Emporium (which proudly carried 6,000 different types of rope. Dwayne wasn’t picky, and grabbed the first one he saw.) in the very front of the colony, and took his first step past it into the heart of the city.
There was a stone fountain located in the very heart of Orangaton which, just a day ago, happily spewed out all of the colony’s water supply. It was now completely in ruins, water still running, building up underneath the scattered statue. Dwayne gulped. Just a quick look, and then I’ll be out of here. He looked around. There was four roads around the water fountain, each winding down to different directions. He knew he wouldn’t be able to go down and search all four roads, so he chose the road on the top right, and the road on the top left, both leading away from the way he came where Lassie was. He walked and started down the top right road.
Down the road used to home five very large apartment buildings, and a small shopping spot. Dwayne couldn’t believe his eyes, and his eyes couldn’t bare to look at what he was seeing as he walked along the road. He flinched. There were rabbits and potatoes of all kinds scattered around, underneath stone, covered with dust, this way and that way. Some seemed to have been in some fairly good shape, except for the whole not moving part, but then there were some who had apparently got the full blow of the attack. It was not a sight for those who are easily upset. Dwayne lifted many rocks to get a good look at each and every victim, and Sir Jebidiah was nowhere to be found. He even found some pieces of potato thrown about, apparently victims of the rabbit’s mashings. After looking tirelessly for Jebidiah on the road, he finally gave up. He was obviously not on this road. He got off his knees, threw a rock over his shoulder, and stopped dead in his tracks. He heard something, just out of the corner of his ear... a voice, high pitched, and muffled. He paused and listened...
...and there it came again. It seemed to be a cry for help. It came from a distance, it sounded very far away. “Hang on!” Dwayne screamed. “I’m coming! Hang on!” he ran even further down the street, heading to the direction that he thought the voice was coming from. The voice kept hollering, screaming, and crying. It wasn’t saying any words, but it was very obviously a cry for help. There was a survivor, somebody survived... his search was not in vain.
“Hang on!” He said again. But the voice was not becoming louder, even as Dwayne ran this way and that. He had no idea where it was coming from. He felt as if he was blind as a bat, aimlessly running, picking up rocks, searching for the source of the noise. He concluded it must be coming from the other street, and so he ran as fast as his little bunny paws could carry him. Hop. Hop, Hop. No, not under that rock... not there... his mind was racing. Where was the victim?
He was becoming very tired, and had a harder and harder time lifting up the debris to look. The screams didn’t stop - apparently the victim had a very large lung capacity. “Keep.. keep... keep screaming!” he hollered, huffing and puffing. He closed his eyes, and brushed off some debris, noticing another creature laying there. It didn’t appear to be moving, but he couldn’t be sure. It was definitely rabbit in shape. The revealed fur was magnificent white. There was a top-hat on the ground not far from the rabbit’s head. Dwayne looked down. He recognized that top-hat...
Dwayne turned the body over, only for it to reveal itself to be the whole point of Dwayne’s journey, Sir Jebidiah himself. His monocle was still on his right eye, but the glass was cracked and half-missing. He had a very small, pink nose. Some of his whiskers were actually missing, ripped straight off his nose. Dwayne couldn’t believe his eyes. His ears shrunk, his heart thumped, and his eyes watered. No... no, it can’t be... this can’t be true... my friend... Sir Jebidiah was, most definitely, dead. Dwayne leaned down and brushed some debris off of Jebidiah’s head. He kissed his cheek a wet kiss, as he couldn’t help himself from crying. His emotions were unjarred as he collapsed on the ground in tears, clutching Jebidiah’s body. He owed so much to Jebidiah... for Jebidiah was the reason Dwayne and Edith were able to be wed.
Dwayne had very little money during this time, as he never had much. He had just met the love of his life, Edith Barmington, who lived in a neighboring colony not far from the Rabbit Hole, where Dwayne resided. Dwayne wanted nothing more but to ask Edith for her hand in marriage, but he had no money at all to buy a ring. He turned to his best friend in the whole world, Jebidiah, and asked for the money.
“Please,” he said. “Please, Jebidiah. I wish to marry her... please, will you lend me the money? I promise you, I will pay you back ever last cent... plus interest!” he exclaimed.
Jebidiah wouldn’t hear of it. He wanted nothing back, not even a cent. “No, no, m’dear Dwayne! We can’t have that, now can we? You take all the money you need, my friend, and you get yourself a woman who you will care for as she deserves.” he said. And then he simply gave Dwayne the money, and was on his merry way. Dwayne and Edith were happily married the following week.
Yet there lay Sir Jebidiah, there and now, right before Dwayne’s very eyes. The screaming ceased as Dwayne’s senses started fading. Dwayne could barely believe it, yet he knew deep inside that this was what he was going to be facing when he came to Orangaton. If Sir Jebidiah had been living, he would have actually drowned in the puddle that was Dwayne’s tears. He pushed dirt over the body, and payed his final respects to his best friend in the world, his only friend, Sir Jebidiah.
Dwayne’s ears flipped open once more, again hearing the cries. Dwayne got to his feet with a new found strength, his determination multiplied ten fold. He was going to find this person, and he was going to do it for all the lives who ended before their time because of the human monsters.
“I’m coming! Keep yelling, just don’t stop! I WILL find you!” He hurried about, looking for the source of the voice with the strength and determination of twelve rabbits. He didn’t stop once until he finally found it.
The voice was screaming from inside a hole. The hole was deeply covered with moss, debris, and other such materials. It was a miracle Dwayne managed to hear the calls for help at all. He quickly tore off all the moss, and the owner of the voice was revealed to him. It belonged to a small red potato, just a wee tot, crying and crying. He looked no older than a single week old. He glanced around, and saw no other potato being anywhere near the hole. Where had this tot been? Where had it come from? Why wasn’t it with it’s parents, and... how did it end up in this hole? The hole was completely to blame for the tot’s survival. The tot was beautiful in Dwayne’s eyes. His eyes were watering up once more, but for a different reason this time... a much happier reason. He put his arm down the hole, and picked the tot up out. He was very light, and seemed to twinkle in the sunlight. Dwayne smiled. He had never held a baby so close before. The tot stopped crying instantly. The pain that had just been unleashed on his heart, just minutes before, was already beginning to numb. All because of this little baby potato...
Dwayne walked back back down the road and found Lassie. He took some ripped blinds and covered the baby tot up in them. He told himself that he’d never tell anybody exactly what happened that day, untied Lassie, and climbed aboard. He started for home.
The voyage from Orangaton was not nearly as rough as the venture to. The sky was now pitch black, stars gleaming and shining overheard. The crickets chirped loudly, and Lassie made slight yawning noises every so often. The noises, which usually would have been annoying and disruptive to Dwayne, did nothing but sooth him after what had been a very difficult day.
By the time Dwayne reached the Rabbit Hole, it was very late and very dark. Most homes were completely devoid of light, as everybody was sleeping lightly in their hay sacks. It was the end of a very normal day for them. But for Dwayne, the day was anything but normal. This was going to be a day he remembered for the rest of his life. He knew he was going to be laughing, crying, and sighing over this day. Dwayne smiled down at the sleeping spud in his arms. He reached home, knowing that nobody and nothing was going to be there waiting for him. Edith had most definitely left. But he no longer blamed her. He knew his mistake - he got the feeling that he never gave Edith as much attention, love, and care as he should have. He was so preoccupied with the war, the mayor, and the hole. But all of these things seemed silly to Dwayne now.
The new found beauty of the hole was not lessened by the darkness. Dwayne couldn’t believe that after living in the hole for so many years, he hadn’t looked at it in such a way. The beauty was breathtaking even now. How foolish he was to miss this. He’d never look at the Rabbit Hole as just a dirty, busy little place ever again. From this point on, he’d look at it the way it was meant to be looked at - home. He road up to his own little house, and was surprised to see lights in the hallway. Could it be? He tied Lassie back up in the back yard, gave her some hay, and then went inside quietly, spud in hand.
He opened the door to come to Edith sitting on the kitchen table. She had her hands on her face, covering her eyes. She shook, startled at the squeak the door made. “Dwayne...” she said.
“Edith... you’re here. You’ve stayed...”
“I just couldn’t leave, Dwayne... I don’t think I ever thought I could. I was just so upset, so very upset Dwayne...”
“I know, and I apologize... I promise you Edith, things will be different. I promise you that I’ll never put you second, ever again.”
“What’s that in your hand?” she asked, glancing up for the first time.
“Edith... I found Sir Jebidiah. He... I... well, we won’t be hearing much from him anymore. He didn’t... but I found this, Edith. And I couldn’t leave him. It would have been too cruel...”
“He’s beautiful, Dwayne. Who are his parents?” she said as she got up, taking the bundle of blinds containing the baby tot in her arms. She cradled the spud as he slept.
“I don’t know. There’s no name tag, and his parents... they were no where to be found. Nobody was at all.” Dwayne’s eyes were tearing up again. “Edith, I always wanted a little baby... you ever think of adopting?” he asked.
Edith smiled at him. “I think that’s a marvelous idea.” she looked down at the sleeping spud in her arms. “He’s going to need a name, you know.”
“Can’t go through life without a name, now can we?” he lay a soft paw on the baby, and looked up at Edith’s face. By some miracle, somehow, they both agreed on a name the very first try. They were thrilled, looking ahead at what was sure to be the most wonderful part of their lives. A new chapter was about to open for Dwayne, Edith, and the baby tot.
Edith smiled. “There it is then. The perfect name... it fits him so well.” she tickled the front portion of his body. He giggled a little bit in his sleep, and Dwayne and Edith both laughed along with him. Edith tried to speak, but the words were drowned in a light flow of tears. She weakly managed to choke up exactly what she was trying to say.
“Hello there, little Simon.”