Finding Home
A Journey to Belong
By Dianne M. Copley
Illustrations by Jennifer M. Hoffman
Published by MAP
Copyright 2011 by Dianne M. Copley
Illustrated by Jennifer M. Hoffman
All rights reserved. Editing, production, cover design and publishing
by Manuel Asencio Publishing at Smashwords
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Dedicated to my son, Brayden
Chapter One
With morning prayers complete, a monk named Daansar leaves the great hall of the Temple and starts down a long expanse of stairs. He reaches into a pouch under his robes and retrieves a crust of bread and a few pieces of dried fruit from his breakfast. At the bottom of the stairs sits a child named Litenya. Most of his twelve years hold few distinct memories and no bonds, but Litenya knows he can count on Daansar. The humble monk always makes an effort to share his food with this creature of the streets. He approaches as Litenya looks intensely at something held in his small gnarled hands. The boy raises his head and greets his friend with a crooked smile. Daansar offers the food and notices the stone Litenya clasps tightly.
“Greetings and welcome to another day in this life. I am honored that you choose to share it with me once more,” the monk bows to Litenya.
“I am hungry again and you always feed me,” the boy acknowledges.
“What have you there?” asks the monk.
“A stone the gem merchant discarded,” replies the boy. “I am not certain if he threw it at me, to shoo me away, or gave it to me as his offering of help.”
“May I have a closer look?” the soft-spoken monk inquires. The child trembles as he extends his arm.
The boy’s body is twisted and out of proportion, presenting great difficulty with his every movement. He begins to eat, snuffling and drooling as he chews and swallows. Sitting next to him, the monk carefully examines the stone. There are tears rolling down the child’s cheeks but Dansaar thinks nothing of it, for the boy’s eyes often water and mat. Then the monk hears him whimper between bites.
“Are you in pain? What do you need?”
“I’m sad and wonder why I am so different, crippled and ignored by people. Most turn away and do not want to speak to me. This makes me feel so alone. Why must it be this way?”
“We are all different and limited, yet each perfect in our own way. If you try to think of the differences as necessary parts of a big picture, everything put together becomes a beautiful masterpiece. This stone is your answer,” declares the monk. “You have been given a much greater gift than you know.”
“I have no home; I do not belong. And, like this stone, no one wants me,” sobs Litenya. “How could this life or a messed up stone be such a great gift?”
“Place the stone near your eyes,” urges Daansar. “Tell me what you see.”
“I see only the chip with green edges.”
“Now move it a little further away and tell me what you see,” coaxes Daansar.
“An easily discarded flawed piece of jade that no one wants,” huffs Litenya, impatiently.
“Now, would you like to take a short journey of discovery with me?” asks Daansar.
Raising an eyebrow in curiosity, Litenya answers, “I have nothing better to do. It would be a change from my miserable routine.”
Chapter Two
The morning sun has come to rest on top of the peaks in the distance. It shines squarely in the faces of the two friends as they rise and begin the journey. Shadows stretch long across the temple grounds as they clasp hands. Daansar and Litenya keep their heads bowed as they shuffle out the gate and meander towards the misty hills of the north.
Daansar keeps the pace slow and even, to insure that Litenya will fare well. He understands the strife this life presents to the struggling youth. He considers this day destined, and this journey with Litenya is to be an enlightening adventure. The precious stone, seemingly flawed, will complete a mosaic and make known a greater picture that will hopefully bring light into Litenya’s life. He looks forward with great joy to entering the old temple ruins which will reveal and share a magical scene. An interpretation of the universe that the people of the world have forgotten, the sacred mosaic which displays the balanced workings of the world’s religions will be complete once again.
“You say you have no home, that you do not belong,” whispers Daansar.
“I live on the streets and beg, never knowing where I will sleep each night,” replies Litenya.
“Is home a place or a feeling?” probes the monk. “Is belonging not a choice? Many would say home is a dwelling or residence of family, a place where one belongs. Others might consider it the point at which one aims to arrive at or return to. We are constantly arriving at new growth and discovery on this journey we call life. That is the point aimed at. Likewise, all we must do is choose to belong. Home is a feeling and, if we choose to do so, we are home anywhere, anytime. To my mind, we are home now, yet you are not. That thought keeps us separate. All you need do is to feel at home, and you belong.”
The boy does not speak for a while. The words Daansar shares are much to consider. He truly wants to understand and know belonging. It will take a little time for this new way of thinking about his life to sink in. So often alone with his thoughts, focusing on survival has dominated Litenya’s energies. Now curiosity moves him forward. Maybe there is something more to life? It is time for his awareness to grow.
Daansar also chooses silence for a time. He senses the child’s need to contemplate. The monk’s mind is filled with an image of the wall and his heart is carried high with joy at the thought of a complete mosaic, a picture long forgotten by the people. Daansar’s teacher had referred to this mosaic in his lessons. It depicts a beautiful display of the universe with the union of all religion. But somehow it was neglected when one of the stones disappeared, leaving the scene marred and lacking. Now the wondrous depiction will be complete again. This child will find he has a special part to play in its wholeness and the workings of a mysterious universe.
The sun now shines from above, and the pair gaze beyond the path. There is such beauty to behold. Until this day, Litenya has never been concerned with the world outside the Temple City walls. The vastness takes his breath away and he can see another set of walls far off in the distance. The buildings within blend with the colors of the earth. A mist clings to the hills blurring the outlines of each structure, and add to the mystique of this new place he is soon to enter.
Looking up into Daansar’s eyes, Litenya finally speaks and shares his inner thoughts. “If I belong here and now, then why would the gem merchant throw a stone at me? Does he bid me well, offering a gift, or rather that I move along and out of his sight?” Litenya ponders aloud.
“Open your heart to any and all possibilities. Can you find good in either case?” Daansar queries.
“If his intent is to give a gift, it is good to be giving and generous. But if it is meant to send me away, what good is that?” Litenya asks.
“Do not his choices and actions produce lessons he might learn? If he thought the stone was of no worth and used it to push you away, but later finds that he gave up something of immeasurable value, he might learn regret and humility. If your presence causes him to think about his own life in comparison to yours, he may be learning to be grateful, giving a sincere and earnest gift for your betterment. If you are the instrument of lessons for others, is this not a good thing? Does this not give you worth and purpose? Might this be where you fit into the picture and how you belong to the Whole, in the here and now?” Daansar hopes these suggestions will open Litenya’s heart and raise his opinion of himself, shedding light on his unique purpose.
Again they walk on quietly, but the silence holds magic, and light is beginning to shine within the boy’s heart.
Chapter Three
They finally arrive at the rusty gates of an old temple shrine. Though tired, Litenya is also excited. He has never ventured out of the Temple City walls before today and wants to absorb all within his sight. As they enter the courtyard, two monks in purple robes greet them. They offer water, for thirst is certain after the morning trek. Silently they motion them to be seated and bring food to share. Daansar thanks them and begins to tell of this shrine’s precious treasure.